December thoughts on love

After endless episode after episode of How I met your mother, fighting the urge to throw a brick on the people I share a room with, too much of ignoring my books and my exams just around the block, I’m still trying to figure out my life.

I was drunk on the idea that living life alone would be so much more fun, so much more exciting. Hell I can do things alone, go shopping alone, fight alone, cry alone. But after a while it all started to seem a little, well, boring. 

I knew I was denying love, every time it popped up with its pretty little head and looked at me through those eyes. God, those eyes. But as much as I thought I’ll never have feelings for another being of our kind, I couldn’t help but fall.

So Cupid is still playing his little hide and seek games with me. I keep fighting this urge to completely give myself in, yet every time I end up slowly and deliciously and painfully finding myself getting attached.

I’m at a loss for words when it comes to speaking, or making small talks. Most people find me boring, or maybe they think I’m moody. I am moody, in fact, but it doesn’t mean I hate people’s company. Well, I’ll give anything  not to be alone. I love company, I love people. And though I’ll keep denying it for as long as I can, deep down, whenever I say, ‘I don’t need anyone!’, that’s when I’m the most vulnerable.

I’m a girl, that too a Piscean girl. I’m moody, difficult to manage, vulnerable and dreamy.

 I’m a mess.

And at this point in my life, I’ve come to realise, all we need is love. And all we ever needed was love.

Cold December nights will be just an excuse to cuddle up if we are together. Rainy days will be just an excuse to get drenched. Love makes difficult things seem prettier, if not easier.

So maybe now I understand why humans are social animals. What use is money if we need someone to hold? 

In the end, love will keep us alive.